My Little Boy
by redpinkandwhite
Summary: Young Loki is trying to deal with parents who don't seem to want him and a brother that is hogging the attention. One-shot. Complete.


Life was not easy on Loki. It had never been. However, today seemed to be one of the worst days of all.

Six-year-old Loki stumbled through Asgard, finally finding his way to the long, winding path that lead him up to the Rainbow Bridge. He had had enough of all of the other people in the castle. His tutors were too busy with his older brother and his education to care for Loki. He was handed a book and expected to read it for the rest of the day. So, Loki wandered the halls, trying to find Thor's friends. However, the kids were too busy with their own studies or playing games with the others. None of them really wanted Loki around to play with. He stomped away, suddenly feeling unwanted like a lost puppy. On his final idea, Loki crossed the wide expanse of the palace to finally end up at his father's quarters. However, Odin was working with Thor, trying to get the hyper boy to sit and concentrate. Loki knew that he wasn't needed here. He couldn't think of anywhere else to go. No one wanted to see him because they were all busy with other things. So, he decided he was going to go somewhere where he could be alone and no one would find him. Then, he hoped, they would worry about where he had gone.

Loki crossed his small arms across his chest, childishly stomping his feet as he walked onto the transparent but sturdy rainbow bridge. Whenever he came to look at the rainbow bridge, it always helped him get his mind off of the bad things. His eyes followed the stripes of color between the gold, watching them dance and wave like the tides of the ocean on Midland. The colors all shimmered like snow in the sun, creating a beautiful and entrancing dance of color. No matter how many times little Loki would look at the bridge, he always found it tempted his eyes to look down at the flowing colors.

The universe made everything calm and quiet. The bridge and castle were without flaws. They were perfect. Why, then, he thought, did they make gods so human and... weak? Why did they _have_ to make older brothers? As much as Loki loved his older brother, Thor was always with Odin. Thor couldn't go anywhere or do anything without father's permission (or with a little help from Loki's magic). Odin always praised Thor, and didn't even look at Loki and what he did. And, to make it worse, Thor didn't have any time to play with him.

Loki was alone more often than he spent time with his family.

He plopped down on the edge of the bridge, his short legs barely hanging halfway on the bridge. He stared out at the stars in front of him, his mind wandering. He thought of his brother and how great it would be for the two of them to sit here together, gazing at the stars, and whispering plans of mischief between one another. To plan their biggest prank on the horrible history teacher.

He sighed, reminding himself that Thor was too busy to play. Loki would have to try and entertain himself again.

He stretched out his pale hand so it hovered just below one of the few galaxies that he could spot: a small, white dot that was almost invisible to the eye. If he stretched his vision just barely over the cluster of stars beneath it and looked for the light in the blackness of the sky, he could barely make out the shape of a small, circular object he guessed was a galaxy. It didn't look like anything else. He floated his hand so it was just beneath it, then tugged gently on his magic. He imagined a green flame, one of his magic tricks that he had been working on recently and found quite entertaining, appearing in the palm of his hand.

The flame started out as a small, minute flare that hardly went higher than his fingertips. Loki pushed a little more magic and effort into the fire. The flare erupted into a bigger flame. The edges of the fire just barely hit the bottom of the white galaxy. Loki imagined the galaxy slowly beginning to burn, starting from the bottom of the planets and slowly heating up until fire was raging across all of the planets, decimating all of the life focused there. He could see people fleeing from the fires, trying to survive his attacks. He only cackled as he continued to spray flames around and watch the city go up into ashes-

The click of heels against the glass-like surface of the bridge pulled Loki from his thoughts. He turned to see his mother walking over to him, her arms crossed over her chest and her face twisted into anger. Loki dismissed the flame from his hand and quickly pulled it away from the sky. He turned his head away from his mother, instead choosing to look around at some the stars and galaxies around them. He had enjoyed pretending to destroy the made-up galaxy, but he knew if his mother ever found out about his fantasy, she would tell Father. And if Father found out, Loki would spend more time alone, but he'd be locked up in his room and forced to do studies.

The sound of the shoes halted right beside him. He could feel his mother staring at his back. It was burning a hole through his green shirt, but he said nothing. He continued to gaze at the stars, almost as if he didn't hear anything, feigning innocence. He didn't want anyone to know how lonely he felt on the inside; he thought it would be a good card to hold onto until the end. Besides, the rest of his family treated Loki like he was worthless and useless. Why should Frigga be any different?

"Loki Odinson," his mother started, using her "queen voice" to make her very loud and sound superior. Loki didn't like that voice at all. "Where were you this afternoon? You missed your training with your fight instructor and left Thor alone during the tutoring session after lunch! You left the whole castle in chaos. We were searching every inch of Asguard to try and find you!"

Loki turned to his mother at this point, his green eyes coming up to look into hers. For the first time, he realized, his mother looked afraid and worried. It made her look tired and old, but more normal and less like a Queen. Her hair was a nest around her head, the strands flying everywhere. Her dress was haphazardly skewed across her body, no doubt pristine before, having gotten tangled and turned when she tried to find Loki.

_They were searching to find me? Why would they care? Isn't Thor more important than me? And why does mother seem so sad?_

Loki was unsure of what to say next. He didn't know how to handle a situation like this with so many confusing emotions he didn't understand. So, instead, he chose to remain silent and allow his mother to continue.

"We even had to pull Thor from his lessons to have him help find you! What were you thinking when you went to disappear like that?" The last sentence she spoke was more of a pleading whisper than anything else. All of her anger and fury seemed to have drained from her face, leaving her face full of sadness.

Loki didn't know how to respond to this. His eyes left his mother's, and he looked out upon the stars. He wanted peace. He knew, no matter where he went in Asgard, he would always be alone. So he would rather be alone and by himself rather than wandering the halls and not be able to play with anyone. Deep down inside, though, he knew the real reason was because he couldn't stand to see Thor being treated like the better son and having all of the attention while Loki was left on his own. He wouldn't be able to handle watching his older brother stand in the lime-light while Loki was ignored. He wanted to go to a place where he was appreciated for being himself and where he would be the one to receive the attention. He wished he could be in his own world so he could have someone to play with.

"I just wanted to find a place where I could be loved. Father doesn't spend any time with me anymore, and Thor is too busy playing with his friends and studying to play with me." Without his consent, his eyes began to water. Small, fat tears slowly fell down his face. "I want to go somewhere where Father can pay attention to me, and where Thor can play with me every day. I don't want to be ignored." He babbled on, unable to hold in his grief. The tears fell faster and hotter now, making Loki's cheeks burn. He began to sob. "Why doesn't he love me? Why can't he love me? Why doesn't anyone ever love me?"

Before he could say any more, Loki was suddenly engulfed in fabric. He registered it as his mother's long, flowing white gown. He gripped the fabric in his tiny pale hands. Frigga pulled him up into her lap and gently placed his head on her shoulder. The smell of his mother's perfume entered his nose, and almost immediately calmed him. He gradually stopped sobbing, and the tears came less, though they still ran down his cheeks. His mother gently rubbed circles on his back, calming him even more. He sniffled, a few hiccups echoing through the empty space around them.

"Loki, your father loves you," his mother stated, her Queen voice coming back out. "And your brother definitely loves you." Her hand came up to his well-polished hair and slowly began to stroke it. Her voice suddenly became softer and less harsh. It was the motherly voice that Loki rarely ever heard. "My son. Never believe that your family hates you. Not for a second." She planted a very short, very light kiss on his forehead. "We all love you. Your father and I... Well, we have a kingdom to run. And you know how much of a handful your brother is. He will hardly focus on his studies, no matter what your father and I have tried. So, though we may be putting more time and effort into your brother, you will always be my youngest son. You will always be my magically-talented, black-haired son." She brushed one more kiss across his forehead.

His eyes felt so heavy after crying. He had never understood why. He just thought that the comfort of his mother holding him against her, and her wonderful perfume made him very sleepy. He tried to keep himself awake. Loki had so many things to say and so many things to ask. It seemed that the universe worked against him, though. Before he could control it, Loki felt his eyes close.

"I love you, Mother," Loki whispered, slowly entering the realm of sleep.

"I love you, my son," she muttered back. Before he could think about saying anything else, he fell asleep.

"My dear Loki." She held the little boy in her arms, allowing him to sleep peacefully. "You will never be my birth son, but you will always my little boy."


End file.
